It was a hot boring afternoon…


Let’s start over.

I haven’t played real Magic, meaning in a tournament online or in person, in quite some time and I decided to see when the next event was going to be. I hopped on the website for my area’s organizer ( if you are interested) and saw that it was in fact the coming Saturday.

What follows is a text conversation; some details have been obscured to protect the innocent:

You want to see the two choices that I limited myself with? Of course you do.

No sideboard was ever made for this deck as it was just a brainchild and I never got to it.

Before I get into the decks, I’ll address my little problem (and I’m sure I’m not the only one).

I can’t really explain it. I know I should play a “real” deck if I want to win, but I just can’t help it. I’d rather win with something odd than with just that same deck that wins all the time. It is this reason, and this reason alone, that I say I am a scrub. Winning in my own way is the reason I play, sure it is conceited and hurts my chances, but it is something that I have come to understand and embrace.

I do have reasons for my madness though. I don’t just throw caution to the wind and run whatever. I try to play something that makes sense in the metagame.

On to the decks!

These 2 decks are almost polar opposites. One is a suicide deck that doesn’t want to go past phase 1 and the other is an endgame deck that is lucky to avoid time in every round.

Let’s begin with the Green deck (an homage to Smi77y? maybe, but don’t think this is his flavor).

The deck is very linear. Pump to hit 10 poison. Oh, you noticed some of the oddities?

Postmortem Lunge-This card sneaks in wins. It pulls a dead Elf out of the graveyard and swings in with it. Even after it has been shown and the surprise factor is gone, it does a decent job of pretending to be additional Glistener Elf.

Apostle’s Blessing-Not really an oddity, but I should discuss the number. These are not only for protection. They also do an admirable job at providing reach. Squadron Hawk can suck it once you give your dude protection from White.

Gitaxian Probe-Is the coast clear? Now you know and knowing is half the battle! (I use that line as much as I can…)

Green Sun’s Zenith-I have not seen this card in any other Mono-Green list. It is Glistener Elf five through eight. I also was planning on putting some spicy stuff in the sideboard to fetch with it. Viridian Corrupter is what comes to mind first.

Putrefax-This miser is really just to punch through for the last little bit if you are up against a wall and the game went longer than you wanted.

This deck wins the smoker’s choice because you will finish early every round, win or lose. I think it has plenty of game and can beat pretty much anything out there but it suffers from a consistency problem. A single removal spell at the wrong time spells doom, so some luck is required (I would say more than the usual amount) if this were to make through a whole day’s tournament.

On to my baby-Karncoction!

I’ll hit the hot spot first. Surge Node-Everyone always wants to cut this and they are probably right, but here is my faulty reasoning. Like Lotus Cobra this surges you into crazy things (sorry, I think I just channeled LSV). The only card this works with in the deck is Everflowing Chalice, but boy does it work. Turn three Batterskull is the best feeling in the world, especially when you don’t have to use Stoneforge Mystic.


This being said, this card is the first thing on the chopping block, but before I get into things I would change I’ll finish up on the current list.

Karn Liberated-No, three is not too much. Big boy Karn is one huge wrecking ball and I want to see him a lot. The first one almost always dies quickly and I want a decent chance of being able to drop another one right away. Karn cannot be ignored, especially with some proliferate help. With him on the board the best case scenario for your opponent is they lose a card every turn, worst case is that they have to start the game over with you already ahead. Let me tell you, I said that turn three Batterskull was the best feeling…I lied. Starting the game over with a Batterskull already in play (yes, you get the germ token and you can attack on the first turn) and/or Karn Liberated already in play is the best feeling in the world, but even starting over with just a land or two usually equals a “W”.

Phyrexian Metamorph-The miser’s copy was put in to substitute for a Batterskull and I wound up liking it for all the reasons that dozens of other people have already said.

The Elixir of Immortality are there for life gain, but with a rash of mill decks starting to make the scene (cough Smi77y cough) they gain some extra value.
Blue Sun’s Zenith-With the large amounts of mana that is generated this card usually ends the game. Somehow, when you draw six to seven cards at the end of your opponent’s turn you find the right answer.

What happened?

I went and tested, mostly against Vampires but also against Caw Blade (a Hero of Bladehold variety….so HeroBlade if that is what you want to call it). I was unimpressed with the Green deck. Why? This conversation was had and it explains my thoughts perfectly:

“If you have it then you just win, there is nothing that this deck, or any other, is going to be able to do.”

“But if I don’t, then I just lose.”


Even if I’m being sadistic with my deck choices, I still want the opportunity to outplay my opponents. This Infect deck doesn’t really supply that. Sure, I can point to Apostle’s Blessing and Postmortem Lunge but that isn’t outplaying anybody. Their responses are the exact same and it just falls down to the same question. “Do you have it?”

Moving on.

The Karncoction performed very well in the above testing. It is obviously not ideal but I’ve already run a little long, so instead of going over what I think should change and/or needs to change I ask you to let me know what you think! I will be attending some events in the near future and of course I would love help. Even if your “help” is to tell me to run something else.

Oh wait…the PTQ

I did the only guaranteed thing to not win-I didn’t go. I blamed it on many things but the fact was that I just didn’t have the fire. I severely wanted to go GenCon to compete in Nats but I missed my chance. I feel the embers flaring and I’m itching to win something!